Shame is cyclical. I shame myself for feeling shame. I beat myself up and believe the voice that insists I should be further along in my healing. That I’m a fake and have been fooling everyone, including myself.

Feelings of disgust and contempt follow. The merry-go-round of self-hate and shame spins ever faster.

The merry-go-round you find yourself on is fueled by beliefs that have been programmed into you at a young age. Even though they may feel true, know that they are lies!

When the most painful of emotions roll through, engage the power of breath and use it as a brake pedal.

On the inhale, think: I’m putting on the brakes to the merry-go-round.

On the exhale, think: Can I be gentle with myself?


How to Transform the Painful Emotions That Are Plugged Into Core Beliefs

Shame is cyclical. I shame myself for feeling shame. I beat myself up and believe the voice that insists I should be further along in my healing. That I’m a fake and have been fooling everyone, including myself.  Feelings of disgust and contempt follow. The merry-go-round of self-hate and shame spins ever faster.  The merry-go-round you find yourself on is fueled by beliefs that have been programmed into you at a young age. Even though they may feel true, know that they are lies!  When the most painful of emotions roll through, engage the power of breath and use it as a brake pedal.  On the inhale, think: I’m putting on the brakes to the merry-go-round.  On the exhale, think: Can I be gentle with myself?  How to Transform the Painful Emotions That Are Plugged Into Core Beliefs Do not believe everything your nervous system tells you https://medium.com/reciprocall/how-to-transform-the-painful-emotions-that-are-plugged-into-core-beliefs-3fa8e966e273

I highly recommend a book called "Running on Empty".  The idea of CEN (Childhood Emotional Neglect) is incredibly simple, but profound in its consequences. It is the result of not having your feelings validated enough while growing up. I thought it was so interesting and helped me be more connected and emotionally present in my life. #The Book Club 📚

The Book Club 📚

Britney

thank you for these reminders.  i needed to hear them.  yes, being the observer is very powerful ✍

Manuel

this is spot on. Rewrite your story. Know that you are not alone in dealing with painful past emotions and trauma. Triggers will occur and for me, I have affirmations in place along with a that's okay approach and these are just pesky thoughts. They are not real.

Bobby

Unfortunately as humans, our greatest tool (the mind) can also be our biggest enemy.
One thing that has helped me tremendously over the years, is to observe myself from a 3rd person point of view when I feel a strong emotion coming on. By doing this, I am able to objectively step back and notice my reaction instead of just getting swallowed up into it. Strangely enough, just noticing it does enough for me to help quell the effects of it.

Unfortunately as humans, our greatest tool (the mind) can also be our biggest enemy. One thing that has helped me tremendously over the years, is to observe myself from a 3rd person point of view when I feel a strong emotion coming on. By doing this, I am able to objectively step back and notice my reaction instead of just getting swallowed up into it. Strangely enough, just noticing it does enough for me to help quell the effects of it.

Sam Mendoza

GREAT advice, @D J. Both (1) activating the breath as a physical break to those mental loops, as, among other things, focus on the breath immediately brings our attention to the present and where we are; and (2) the self request to be gentle to ourselves acting as a mental/ rational break to the loop. That's exactly what I try to do.

D J

A group of likeminded people in MEDITATION (mindfulness) are talking about this.