It can't happen when you are trying to become something else. It happens when you un-become who you are not. To become someone else, you need to work hard and push yourself through some unnatural processes of success. But to un-become who you are 'not,' you just need simplicity. Knots open easily when you don't pull them hard but gently work on them. The peels of non-self automatically get skinned out when you are in that simple way of self.